Wednesday, February 15, 2006

From the annals of Tone Deaf history: Johnny Turbo

Do you know about Johnny Turbo? If not, it's time to educate yourself boy. Johnny Turbo is among the most shittiest tone deafiest ad capaigns ever targeted at a video-game playing public. Basically, it's a rediculous attempt by the Turbografix 16 people to discredit Sega's vastly more successful Genesis system through the use of an obese, mal-adjusted cartoon character and his ambiguously gay Tucker-Carson-Lookalike sidekick. Yeah. For real.

You can read the original comic strips, as they appeared in gaming magazines in the early 90s, here, along with a profane, and highly amusing running commentary.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Finger lickin' stupid

There's a new KFC ad out on TV. Thankfully, it does not involve an animated, jive-talkin', hip-hop (or "hip and happening" as USA Today apparently described it) Col. Sanders. Those days are gone. But I couldn't find an image of the new ad, so you get to be reminded of those. Call it the ghost of stupid ads past.

Anyway, this new ad goes something like this: a mother brings home a bucket of greasy, poorly prepared "chicken" from a KFC. She puts it on the table as the husband hovers around, probably waiting to talk about his golf game or how she never shows him enough physical affection anymore. The mother calls up to the kids that they need to come downstairs for dinner. The kids bomb downstairs, out the door, and into the car. The mother looks at the father and says something like, "Well, they'll have to get used to eating in," as they show one of the kids (who looks to be around 8 and already 30 pounds overweight) scrambling to get his seatbelt on.

So...apparently...this family only eats out. All the time. To the degree that their mindless children have the Pavlovian response of running out to the car for dinner. It isn't even like they say, "Get ready for KFC"...which still wouldn't make sense, because, correct me if I'm wrong, KFC has been a take-out place for its entire existence. And I love that the kid they emphasize is fat. Are they trying to corner the market on fat kids? That's probably a good move...they eat a lot and there's a hell of a lot of them in America.

What exactly are they trying to advertise here? That you can bring KFC food home now? Or are we to believe that this family used to go out to regular restaurants every night, and now they're cutting costs and staying classy by getting KFC instead? Why don't you buy a fucking breast of chicken and drop it in the oven? Maybe your butterball of a kid won't need an angioplasty before he's twenty.

(And, in honor of Mr. Shannon, here's a page about KFC wrongdoings that go beyond being utterly tone deaf.)